WE'RE SCHWARTZY AND PAGANA.
AND WE'RE FAMOUS.

Not since the days of Laurel and Hardy has a pair of multitalented comics performed to such a high level of popular and critical acclaim... until Abbott and Costello.

And not since the days of Abbot and Costello has an American comedy duo been such a top box office draw in the motion pictures... until Martin and Lewis.

But not since Rosencrantz and Guildenstern have two insignificant side characters made such a big deal about themselves... until Schwartzy and Pagana!

With all the nobility of Groucho Marx talking to hisself, all the subtlety of Olsen and Johnson, all the racial sensitivity of Amos and Andy, all the combined intelligence of at least two of the Three Stooges, and all the worldwide appeal of two fellas you've never heard of — we're Schwartzy and Pagana, and we know that you and the rest of the world is still kinda backward, but we're ready to bring you up to our level. And by up we mean down. And by level we mean slanted. You're welcome!

Enjoy our shenanigans all over the webbynet. Visit our video section. Subscribe to us on youtube. Talk dames into going out with us.

Find us on facebook, twitter, myspace, linkedin, yelp, match.com, exposing our privates outside public schools, exposing our pube-lics outside private schools, peeking in your bedroom window, and defending ourselves in courtrooms. 

And when you find us, bring a steaming cup of coffee and a steaming plate of corned beef hash, and we'll guarantee to provide you with a steaming pile of comedy. 

JAZZ HANDS!